Pay For Performance in Sports. Youth Sports?

Most of my 3 readers know that I recently coached my son's Under 8 year old soccer team. It was a fun experience that I was glad when it was over...but I am looking forward to the Spring season already!

I think it also goes without saying that my HUGE readership knows I am a slightly competitive person. Which is why this year seemed to be a good year for me to start coaching the team. I can see that competitiveness in many of the boys on the team. The "flower-pickers" are dwindling....although there are still a couple.

As a competitive person, I always enjoy doing better. I admit that I also enjoy beating the guy (or girl) next to me! Call it a flaw. OK, enough with the dribble, onto the topic at hand.

One game this fall, late in the season, one of the boys scored a goal. He was so excited! I was pretty happy for him! He is not a bad player but not one of the stand outs either. I love seeing these guys light up when they make a great play or score a goal. His Dad, who never makes it to a practice and I think this was the only game he made it to, seemed pretty stoked as well (hell, Dad was even off his cell phone to see the goal!). It looked like Dad was giving a "high five" up in the air.

The next day, my assistant coach and I were at a soccer camp both our kids attended. He was telling me that the boy's father was pretty excited when the goal was scored. Also, that he held up his hand with five fingers open. I said yeah, I saw that. Then the assistant coach asked me if I knew what he meant by that, I said "No". It means $5.

Apparently, Dad was paying his son $5 for every goal he scored. I was pissed.

These kids are....well...KIDS! Really, you are going to teach your 8 year old that every time he does something good, you are going to pay him?!?

I had a dilema on my hands here. I really did not feel this was appropriate. How does this foster the competitive spirit? Or the idea of doing something good for the TEAM? What happens the next time this kid is going down with the ball and can pass it to an open player, will he or will he go for the "Pay-Day"?

I really did agonize over this. Probably too much. But it ate at me. So, for the final games, this boy played in goal or on defense. I know this was probably a bit juvenile on my part. But, how do you change this? How do you change what someone has, and is, growing up with? How do you teach someone that being competitive and achieving your goals is good enough? I don't know. I am not that good of a coach! :)

In the following weeks, I did ask a few friends if they paid their kids for goals or grades or other things. No. Good...

I really wonder what professional athletes think of this kind of action. Lance Armstrong. Michael Phelps. Since they are among my readership, please feel free to comment. :)

Love the game first...